what does it take to be a beautiful girl??

Is it our beautiful, famous-branded, designer, clothes?
Is it our bag that costs us thousands of dollars??
Or is it the make ups we put on?
Or maybe is it our 10cm-heel *hell* shoes??
What about our mini skirts??hot pants??bikinis??do they make us look beautiful??
do we look better in our uber pricey, sexy-looking, garment-lacking tops???

Or is it our truly-natural looking self that is carrying our most pure heart that makes us look beautifull??
which one is more appealing? a girl wearing a oh-so-not-elegant burberry pattern shirt but does not look good on her??or a girl who just wear a plain polo shirt but dress up gracefully???

what do u guys reckon??
what defines a person? what makes a person that person?
does a person look better if they use a latest phone on the market??
will a person look better if they eat uber-pricey, unhealthy, fatty food??
or maybe he/she looks better if he/she eats so-called-healthy0but-in-fact-not caesar salad??
fyi, caesar salad is so fatty...!! dont ear caesar salad for the sake of salad-thing because it will make u -still- fatt..!!

at the end of the day, it is your choice to define a beautiful girl.
you choose to be the person you want yourself to be.
beacuse i, personally, believe that if you are yourself, then you will look gorgeous doesnt matter who you are, how do you look, whether you are having a bad hair day, or just wearing a t-shirt and jeans.
the beauty is inside. not outside.
does not matter how you dress, what phone do you use, is it jimmy choo you are wearing, you look gorgeous if you are gorgeous inside.

life is full of choices.
life is hard per se. dont make it harder by trying to be someone else just to please people because you cannot please everybody.
you are who you wanted to be. you already chose to be who you are.

you are who you are and be who you want to be.

agreed???=)

the one with the withdrawal of her best friend..

Been long since the last post..haha

Anyway, I’ve got a lil bit of problem here.
I have a good friend. A guy.
Just recently I feel that he’s withdrawing himself.
I wanted to ask “hey dude what happened?” but I can’t. Don’t ask me why.. I just cannot. Hahaha.. call me conservative if u want..LOL

Has he found himself a girlfriend and he is afraid that she might get jealous?? Wooww.. Im tempted to think that way but less likely..hahaha but anyway, who knows??=)

Or is he trying to tell me that he felt I like him and he’s trying to tell me “I don’t like u mate. So f*ck off..” hahahaha.. will be shocking if it is..ROFL.
But yeahh.. I feel he’s withdrawing himself. The reason? Only God knows and some of his friends I reckon.

It’s kinda weird…!!! I feel weird because usually we are so close. We always joke around. Even from the way he’s joking with me I can sense that it’s somehow different. Feels like he is trying to keep some distance between us. Was it just me or he actually is???
And the other day, he accused me –jokingly- that I lied to him..
WTH mateee!!! I didn’t lie about anything. I have never hid anything from you. You are one of my closest friends. I wont hide things from my close friends cos’ you guys are my second family..=) was this “so-called lie” is the reason for the distance??

ORRRRRR…the worst thing that I can think is that I did make a mistake!!!
OhMyDearestGod..!!! did I ?????
Anyway, I hope this weird feeling is just one sided..=)
I hope I didn’t make a mistake.. I am truly madly deeply sorry dory morry if I did.. Of course you know I didn’t mean to do so..T.T

I have another idea popped out in my head just a moment ago. Maybe he does that for "this" reason that is kinda inappropriate to put it down here..
Not that he liked me because I believe not for any shit on this world he will!!!hahaha=p *and I am pretty sure this reason cannot be categorized as inappropriate*
so, just leave this out.

SO, to finish this...
xoxo my dear friend..i miss the old you =(
and please let me know when the old you has came backk..:)

Ps: exam period is coming ahead, I expect a weight gain of 1-2 kilos in the next two weeks..

PPs: A gain of 3-4 kilos is also expected taking into account my swollen body resulted from staying up late..haha

Ps again: also I might be an anti-social person until 22 June 2009. And I might experience more sensitive feeling during that period so just bear with me for a moment..hahahaha=p *finding excuses*

PPs again: Yaaaayyyyy..I still have an elective subject left so, it means, I can take Chinese as my elective. And believe me, I will take the level that wont bore the hell out of me, but will make me graduate by the end of this year..!!!hahaha=)

In His own time, in His own unique ways..

I have just found out that one of my friend had just had her breast operated.
Not cancer, just a lump but still that was a strange thing in your body which in the future might *or might not* grow into a cancer.
I confirmed to another friend what was actually happened.

Grey's Anatomy come to the rescue...=)
A friend gave her grey's anatomy.
What happened was this friend of mine knew something felt so weird with her boobs but only after watching grey's anatomy that she realised thing maybe that bad.
That is actually the episodes where an old lady came to the hospital saying something is wrong with her boobs and this episode just happened to be similar to my friend's case that she went to see a doctor..
So happeningg..!!

God has His own plan, His own ways, His own time.
Human can make thounsands of plans, but none of them can override God's.
This friend of mine for example.
Who wants to have problems like hers??
Noone!!
That was every girls' bad dream. Noone wants to have any lump on her breast.
That will not make a woman Not-woman..at least in my opinion.
But still, it might bring any psychological effect as we live in Indonesia where people's opinion dictates the way we have to behave.

I am amazed..I am truly truly amazed.
God is good. God is amazing.
Who would think that one episode of a drama can save my friend's life??
I guess this might have happened a lot of times but this time it happened in front of me.
I witnessed the goodness of God.
Everything happen in His time...
Im still amazed..No words can describee..

One lesson I got here,
Believe in God..
Have faith in Him and everything is gonna be fine because He has good plan and not a plan of destruction..

Another lessonn......
WATCH GREY'S ANATOMYYY..!!!!!
It's good, people..
And its usefulness is pro..hahaha=p

PS: Dedicated to my friend Valen..
Everything is gonna be fine darl..Jesus loves u..and so do I..=)

A journey of faith in Jesus

I want to share a very very interesting reflection I heard from a friend who got this from a priest and she really did contemplate this.
“Jesus is your GPS”
WHAT??!!
Yes people, Jesus is your GPS.

Do you know how GPS work? I bet every people do.
Jesus in some ways guide you throughout your life like GPS do. He will tell you which direction to go, which turn to take, where the round about is, etc. Jesus has the map of your life, all roads and streets you can take.

This friend of mine shared her experience with using a GPS. She knows how to go to the place she usually has her cell group. However, that day, having heard of this reflection, she tried the GPS. What happened was that GPS gave her a different route than the one she usually takes. As she had some spare time she thought she might as well try this different route. This route was a total different from the route she is familiar with but having said that she tried to “have faith” in the GPS and start following the route it gave her. While driving she was contemplating about the GPS being the analogy of her journey of faith.

Even when you are still in the womb, Jesus has calculated your route in coming back to Him. Jesus has given you the best possible way to find Him. He does know you and your limit as a human and therefore He calculated roads and street that will not give you obstacles that you cannot deal with. But what always happen is that you are always get distracted with things on the way. You always made your way out of calculated route and even though the GPS has told you “wrong turn..wrong turnn..” you will make that turn anyway because you found something very interesting on that road. Every GPS will re-calculate your route and so does Jesus. He will re-calculate your journey so that you will get back on track. The re-calculation will sometimes take a long time and sometimes not. It will sometimes also direct you to road that you are not familiar with and maybe through road that you find it difficult to deal with. However, be assured that that road will take you to your destination safe and sound for Lord has promised us plans to prosper and no to harm, and a future filled with hope (Jeremiah 29:11).
In the end, my friend chose to go the way the GPS directed her and she arrived safely at her destination. That is exactly how we should keep our faith in Jesus.

When your GPS starts to annoy you turn it OFF but don’t turn Jesus OFF.. Stay tune in Him always =)
Install a new GPS when your old GPS is broken, but never ever “install” a new Jesus because Jesus never obsolete.
Last but not least, Jesus is not a GPS and a GPS is not Jesus. But have faith in Jesus like you do in your GPS.

VaniGo 020509
Thanks to Tina dan tumpangannya pulang dan cerita2 menarik yang selalu di-share sama saya=)

Why is it called friendship??

Have you ever thought why people called it friendship?

Friendship is unlike love.
whilst love can be one sided, friendship can never be.
That is why to me friendship is more important than love.

Why friend+ship?
because when you become friend you are on the same boat.
You experienced the same thing, you know things that the other know.
You suffered from the same weather, you fight the same enemy.
When something goes wrong you fix things together.
You complete each other in a way a love sometimes failed to do.

If that is so then why hiding things from each other?
Hiding things is a form of lying.
Friend never lied to each other because once you did friends can never trust each other again.
It will just damn well ruin your journey..

Anywayy...,
If eating is a crime..
Then, i missed my partners in crime..
Gendut dan Kebo...i miss u so muchhhhh..=p
Hope your grandpa is okayy..
I do really miss our outings.
Miss your big apetite..*uuppsss*
Miss the dvd hunting..
Come here soon matesss...*and dont forget bring me some richeese*

P.S: of kros I do miss Rosa my partner in good deeds as well as bad deeds..lol

8th February '09

I think there is something different with one of my friends.
2 hari yang lalu dia bilang nanti Rabu bakal undergo a high risk surgery. Kelihatannya hari itu dia khawatir banget. Reasonable sih soalnya kalo dipikir2 if I were him ya sama saya juga bakal khawatir sangat.
And today, dia beda jadi pendiam. Usually,kita chat seharian dari pagi sampe malem ngomong ini itu. Hari ini dia lebih pendiam. Ga tau dia ada memang lg ada masalah lain yang ga bisa cerita ke aku atau emang masih kepikiran masalah surgery itu.
I feel like as a friend I'm so useless ga bisa bantuin apa2. Yah aku juga ga expect dia bakal cerita masalahnya kalo emang terlalu pribadi sihh. I just feel like helping if I can.
Well,anyway if u read this u know who u are dan soal surgery itu percaya aja lah sama si prof kan om anda juga suka tanya2 sama dia berarti dia bisa dipercaya tohh hehehe. The rest let God do His wonderful works. I believe ur gonna be okayyy..=)
I can do nothing juga paling2 cuma comfort u doankk..mau diajak ngmg soal penyakitnya juga ga ngertiii..hehehe=p

Anyway, tiba2 kepikiran dalam pikiranku. Nasib orang di dunia ini bener2 unpredictable.
There is this person I know. 3 minggu lalu orang ini masih baik2 masih bisa tertawa bercanda tadi pagi tiba2 ada kabar orang ini meninggal *my condolences*.
On the other hand, ga kebayang juga malem ini bakal have fun se-fun2-nya. Hehehe.

Hmm..it's late, time to sleep.
Perasaan sudah lebih enteng kalo ginii..haha.
Seharian kepikiran ada apa dengan konco plek saya iniii.. Apakah saya dicuekin karena kesalahan saya hari ituu??? I'm so sorry yah kalo iyaaa=(
Susah juga yah kalo jadi org terlalu gampang mikirin org laen. Tp jd org terlalu cuek ya susah. Pusing ga tuh???=)

First Love Never Dies??!!

Is it true first love never dies??

Once I was in love with someone say Mr X.
That was when we were in 4th grade.
*omg that was like thousand years agoo:p*
It was a monkey love and we never date not until today.

We grew up to became a very best friend a BF without the second F and you'll know why later on:p
We never hesitate to share everything we have, every story we heard, every occasion we experience. We never know the word embarrassing because none of those stories are never did to us. We share almost everything. Even when our parents were fighting we will call the other and cried out loud.
We fought so many times but we still reconcile in a pretty silly way.always.

We grew even older, made more friends, met more people, experienced more of life's bitter and sweet.
Until one day we had that big fight and never reconcile until today.
He hurt my feeling. I know I did too.
However, somehow if God give me the chance to I still wants to be his friend again.BFF this time I hope.
It will always comes up the first on my grown up xmas list.

Growing up, I learnt that true love never dies.
Neither will it survive.
Only true love will never dies and eventually will survive forever until death do it part=)